


there’s something wrong in the village

by SpectresWonderland



Series: hsmtmts songfics [2]
Category: High School Musical: The Musical: The Series (TV)
Genre: Catholic E.J. Caswell, Catholic Guilt, E.J.-Centric, Gay E.J. Caswell, Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Religion, Songfic, The Village - Wrabel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-25
Updated: 2020-04-25
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:40:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,599
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23572507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpectresWonderland/pseuds/SpectresWonderland
Summary: TW:HomophobiaSlursAbuseHi! I’m a baptist and I’m sorry if I got anything about catholic tradition wrong. feel free to correct me if anything is off!also, I know that not all catholics are like this! I’ve actually known some catholics that are amazing people.
Relationships: Ricky Bowen/E.J. Caswell
Series: hsmtmts songfics [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1693258
Comments: 4
Kudos: 36





	there’s something wrong in the village

**Author's Note:**

> TW:  
> Homophobia  
> Slurs  
> Abuse
> 
> Hi! I’m a baptist and I’m sorry if I got anything about catholic tradition wrong. feel free to correct me if anything is off!
> 
> also, I know that not all catholics are like this! I’ve actually known some catholics that are amazing people.

**_No, your mom don't get it._ **

**_And your dad don't get it._**

**_Uncle John don't get it._ **

Elijah James Caswell was your picture perfect catholic boy. He went to mass on sunday, he had crosses hung on his wall, wore a crucifix, and prayed the rosary. He was the poster child for perfect student too. Star of the East High water polo team, 4.0 GPA, leading man of the drama club for three years running, President of the school’s FCA. He was an all around good kid. 

Except for the not so good part. E.J.... didn’t like girls.

Yes, he dated girls, but just to throw his family off his back, because he knew if he even _looked_ at a rainbow pattern, he’d be torn down.

He’d always hear his parents talking about gay people, spitting out words of scorn. And the slurs. E.J. had been hearing those since before he even knew what they meant.

His extended family were not too much better though. Hell, when his cousin Ashlyn told her parents that she didn’t believe in God, they nearly kicked her out.

So if either of them ended up gay? They’d be dead.

**_And you can't tell grandma_ **

**_'Cause her heart can't take it_ **

**_And she might not make it_ **

E.J.’s grandma was one of the most important people in his life. She’d taught him how to _be_ a good catholic. He didn’t know whether to thank her or to blame her honestly.

She was traditional too though, and her viewpoints were the exact same as the rest of E.J.’s family.

E.J. loved her too much to break her heart.

**_There's something wrong in the village_ **

**_In the village, oh_ **

**_They stare in the village_ **

**_In the village, oh_ **

E.J. cried at his confirmation.

Tears started pooling in his eyes as his godfather’s hand was rested on his shoulder as he stood before the bishop. And they finally fell when the bishop made the cross on E.J.’s forehead with the Chrism Oil.

The oil felt wrong on his forehead, like E.J. didn’t have a _right_ for it to be there.

_He_ didn’t have a right to be here in his own mind. He wasn’t as ‘good’ of a catholic as he thought he was if these feelings, these thoughts, would keep coming after him, gnawing at his heart.

**_There's nothing wrong with you_ **

**_It's true, it's true_ **

**_There's something wrong with the village_ **

**_With the village_ **

He had no idea what came over him when he kissed Ricky in the bathroom. If anything, he should have been mad at the guy. He just threw a _basketball_ at his face. But why kiss him?

_He did it to shut Ricky up. It didn’t mean anything to him._

**_Feel the rumors follow you from Monday all the way to Friday dinner_ **

**_You got one day of shelter,_ **

**_Then it's Sunday hell to pay, you young lost sinner_ **

But E.J. kept doing it as the days went on. He and Ricky would stay longer, their kisses grew more frequent, and E.J. would cry about it longer when he got home.

He knew he loved Ricky and he absolutely _hated_ himself for it.

School was.. good for him. He didn’t feel as weighed down there. It kept him busy.

E.J. had bible study on monday mornings, FCA tuesday nights, practices almost every evening, and musical rehearsals in the afternoon. But still, he wanted more. He saw the GSA posters in the hallways, and he longed to be there. He wanted to be a part of something that he didn’t _have_ to feel shameful about.

But he knew if he even mentioned _seeing_ it to his parents, he’d get a belt buckle to the back.

**_Well, I've been there, sitting in that same chair_ **

**_Whispering that same prayer half a million times_ **

At least in the youth group, E.J. felt like he belonged somewhere. Like he got along with people more. But the sunday after his confirmation, his parents forced him to start going to the young adults group.

He felt alone there, although there were ten other people, he felt completely and utterly alone.

Hell, E.J. almost broke down the first time they prayed the rosary together.

He held the three small beads between his fingers as he said the Hail Mary's, and tears started to pool in his eyes.

E.J. didn’t belong here.

**_It's a lie, though buried in disciples_ **

**_One page of the Bible isn't worth a life_ **

E.J. knew he was fucking up the minute he opened his mouth, but he couldn’t stand to hear his parents talk shit about Seb like that.

After they had gotten home from opening night of _High School Musical,_ which his parents actually took off work for, his parents went on a rant about them, calling them an abomination, and a fag, and so many other horrible words.

“ _It was a **girl’s** rolewhy was **he** playing it?”_

_“The makeup made **him**_ _look like a fucking fairy.”_

And so much more shit.

They kept talking, and _kept talking,_ until E.J. had enough.

“They’re not a boy,” E.J. insisted.

His father immediately turned to him, “Excuse me?”

“Seb isn’t a boy,” he said again.

He cringed backwards a little as his dad came closer, but still held his ground the best he could.

“Are you defending that abomination then son?” He asked.

“Yes sir,” he said firmly, “They’re my friend.”

He saw his dad’s hand clutch tighter to his bible and his heart skipped a beat, “Are you one of them too Elijah? A damn faggot?”

“ _Yes,_ ” E.J. snapped, _way_ against his better judgment, his hands clenched at his sides, “Yes, I’m _gay_ dad, I like _boys.”_

E.J. didn’t even realize his dad was moving until he brought the bible up and smacked him clean across the face with it. The same bible that he saw his dad carrying since he was little. The same bible where he _knew_ Leviticus 18:22 was highlighted _and_ underlined.

He didn’t last too much longer in there house. His father set a timer for ten minutes, and told E.J. to ‘pack his things and leave’.

**_There's something wrong in the village_ **

**_In the village, oh_ **

**_They stare in the village_ **

**_In the village, oh_ **

E.J. was living in his car for almost before people found out. It started when Ashlyn didn’t see him or his car at their family dinner on friday, but she didn’t tell anybody. She though that he may have just had another event. But then she heard murmurs that E.J. didn’t show up to church for mass on sunday. E.J. never missed mass.

He was probably just sick, yeah.. that’s right. I mean, the next monday at school he seemed off, so that only added to her thought.

The week went on, and then the next, and things didn’t look better. He wasn’t at dinner _or_ mass again.

So on the Monday after that, she pulled him aside, “E.J.... where have you been?”

He seemed to panic, but played it off calmly, “I’ve been... here the whole time Ash.”

“No, like.. at family dinners, you haven’t been there, and people are saying you’ve been skipping mass,” Ashlyn saw him freeze, “Did you move out?”

E.J. hesitated, “Kinda.”

“Kinda? E.J., what does that- _oh.”_ Ashlyn knew exactly what ‘kinda’ meant, “E.J.. where’ve you been staying?”

“M-My car?” E.J. admitted refusing to look Ashlyn in the eyes.

Ashlyn hesitated for a moment, debating how to go about asking more, “Since.. when?”

“Opening night..” he mumbled, “They were um, they were talking shit about Seb, so I stood up for them, but ended up telling them I uh.. d-don’t like girls.”

“Oh E.J...” Ashlyn murmured, “You could’ve called me, I could’ve helped you find somewhere to stay.”

He shook his head quickly, “I didn’t wanna bother anyone, I just.. figured that I’d be able to do this on my own.

“E.J. you’re _homeless,”_ Ashlyn pressed, “I’d say you aren’t doing too well.”

“Who’re you saying I should stay with then?”

“Nobody in particular, I’m just saying that the answer might be more obvious than you think.”

**_There's nothing wrong with you_ **

**_It's true, it's true_ **

**_There's something wrong with the village_ **

**_With the village_.**

E.J. ended up on Ricky Bowen’s doorstep that night, hands shaking as he knocked on the door.

The boy answered, looking annoyed, but his expression changed to one of concern when he saw the distressed E.J. 

“Hey... E.J., what-what’s going on?”

E.J. took a deep breath, “I-I came out to my parents two weeks ago, and they um, th-they threw me out,” He started, taking a deep breath, “I’ve been sleeping in my car, b-but Ash found it and told me to talk to somebody, a-and-“

“Slow down, I’m not gonna turn you away, c’mon in, I’ll call my dad,” Ricky said, trying to calm him down as much as possible. 

E.J. almost flinched when he grabbed his arm gently and lead him inside.

He was sat down on the couch, as Ricky called his dad. The younger boy came back after a few minutes and sat down next to him, “He said you’re fine here..” he murmured gently, a hand on his leg.

The two met eyes, and Ricky spoke again, “E.J., you’re safe here.”

And E.J. believed him.

**Author's Note:**

> yo.
> 
> being honest, i haven’t been doing hot. 
> 
> quarantine has been rough, and my lockdown was extended


End file.
